honorable Poohcquaio

Enter Manny Poohcquiao.

Who do you want to fight with next: Soto, Larios, Marquez?

Ah, medyo nahihirapan nga ako dahil sobrang dami nila na gustong makipaglaban sa akin. Parang gusto ko na lang si Solis. Lolit Solis. Hindi na kailangan ng boxing gloves doon. Tsinelas lang puwede na. Kung ayaw niya sa akin, wala naman akong magagawa. Sino bang nawalan? E di ako! (That's difficult. I'd rather fight Lolit Solis, if she wants. We can use slippers, not gloves.)
Why are you running for Congress?
Sana irespeto nila kung ano ang trip ko dahil kung ano naman ang trip nila hindi ko naman pinakikialaman. (I hope the will respect my trip, in the same manner that I respect theirs.)

What's your platform? Your plans?
Marami akong plataporma. Unang-una ang peace and order. Sa amin sa Gen. Santos, maayos naman 'yung order ng mga fish. Marami ang umo-order ng tuna. (First is peace and order. In GenSan, there are many orders for fish, especially tuna.)
Pagkatapos ng congressman, senator naman. Tapos presidente na. Pag naging presidente ako marami akong babaguhin. Imbes na barong Tagalog ang gagawin kong national costume, boxers' shorts na! Ang national anthem, 'Extreme Magic Sing' na. (After congress, I'd aspire to be senator, then president. If I become president, I will order a change in the national costume, from barong tagalog to boxers' shorts. The national anthem will be Extreme Magic sing.)

What about your show biz career? You might not have time for show biz.
Tatlo na ang gagawin ko: boxing, politics and show biz. Wala nang tulugan ito! (I will be very busy, I will not sleep anymore.)

Do you have a new movie?
Ah meron, gagawa kami nila Julie Vega, Nida Blanca, Charito Solis, directed by Lino Brocka. Siguro ang magandang title, "Ikaw na Lang ang Hinihintay." (I have a new movie ... it will be titled 'Waiting for You.")

And your singing career, do you have new albums?
Ah, meron! Marami akong album ngayon. Lalo na marami akong kuha doon sa huling boxing namin. Kinuhanan ako ng misis ko. Bale nalagay na nga sa photo album. (Plenty, my wife is collecting my photo album.)
Ah, 'yung kanta ba? (Ah you mean songs?)

Wala pang bago kasi 'yung unang album, hindi ko alam kung nag-silver o nag-bronze ba 'yun? (Not yet. I'm not even sure if my first album made a bronze or silver, is that it?)

Who punches harder? Jinkee or Solis?
Mas malakas si Jinkee, mahal ko 'yan, nagpapasalamat nga ako sa kanya. Thank you, Jinkee, for always supporting me, every time I have a fight and you are there always. It's so very relaxing and absolutely that, you know ah, you know and thanks God. (Jinkee, I love you ...)
How has traveling abroad improved your English?
Ah ... um ... ahh ... Um ... ah ...Thank you!

What's the secret of your powerful punch?
Spinach! Popeye pala ito! Siyempre proper diet. Tapos exercise. Control lang sa lahat ng mga bisyo. (Spinach, proper diet, exercise. Moderation ...)

Wala akong bisyo...

What do you plan to do with your earnings?
Hinahati-hati ko sa orphanage, simbahan. Tapos meron din para sa mansion, sa convenience store, saka sa bar ko dito sa Roxas Boulevard. Tapos marami rin akong binibigyan ng balato. Tapos meron ding napupunta sa manok. Mahilig ako sa manok! (I gave to the orphanage, church. I also set aside for the mansion which I'm constructing, a convenience store, and a bar along Roxas Boulevard. I also gave money as gift. I also invest in chicken.)
McDonald's fried chicken?
Oo. 'Yun nga ang pinang-sabong ko minsan, natalo ako! (Yes. I've lost money in cockfights.)

How's your private life? Do you still have time for yourself? For your family?
Well... private nga 'yun, bakit mo pa tinatanong kung private? (It's private, don't pry.)

Pag nanalo akong presidente, kasama ko na ang pamilya ko sa MalacaƱang. Parang si Madame GMA. Ayun, kasama niya lahat ng pamilya niya di ba? Mga kamag-anak, mga kapitbahay, ang dami nila doon sa MalacaƱang. (If I become president, I will bring my entire family to Malacanang, like Madame GMA. Her relatives, neighborts, there are so many of them in Malacanang.)

What's your message to our countrymen?
Ah...ang mensahe ko lang sa mga kababayan ko na mahihirap: Mag-tiyaga lang. Ganyan din naman ako dati e. Galing din ako diyan. Basta mag-sipag lang at mag-tiyaga. Mag-boxing na rin kayong lahat. Pati babae. Para marating n'yo rin 'yung narating ko. (Work hard. Persevere always. Take up boxing, even women should take up boxing, then you can achieve what I have reached.)
How are you related to Winnie the Pooh and Fernando Pooh?
Si Winnie the Pooh, pinsang buo ko 'yun. Si Fernando Pooh, bale parang lolo ko yata 'yun. (Winnie is my cousin, Fernando Pooh is my grandfather, I think)

Do you know how to surf the Net? Do you know how to e-mail?
E-mail? Yan ba 'yung envelope mail? Marunong akong mag-Internet. Mag-webcam. 'Yung show me your face! Show me your pancreas! Your intestines! (Oh yes, I know)

We saw you on YouTube.
Dina-download nga 'yun sa Greenhills. P25! Sila lang ang kumikita, hindi ako! (It's available in Greenhills. They are making money.)

How do you plan to solve our country's economic problems?
Ang hirap naman! Ang utak ko hanggang eco lang .. nadugtungan pa! (That's a difficult question...)

How much did you earn in your last fight?
Ah... Sikrit. Hehehe. (Secret...)

What can you say about your title, Pambansang Kamao? Or do you have other body parts in mind?
Parang mas maganda, Pambansang Tattoo. (National Tattoo is better)

What can you say about the brain drain? About doctors working as nurses abroad?
Mahirap talaga dahil maliit ang suweldo dito sa atin. Kaya nga gusto ko sa ibang bansa lumaban. Mas malaki kaysa dito. Kasama din pala ako sa brain drain! (That's why I fight abroad, I make more money there.)

Among the products that you endorse, which is your favorite?
Ah ... Depende sa mood. Minsan nahihirapan ako e, kasi sobrang dami nila. Sabay-sabay dumarating sa bahay. Nalilito nga ako kung paano gamitin.

Minsan 'yung Motolite nagagawa kong mineral water. 'Yung San Miguel Beer nagagawa kong shampoo. 'Yung Datu Puti, nagagawa kong lotion. Minsan nga sinubukan ko na sabay-sabay inumin ang Alaxan, Circulan, Motolite, San Miguel Beer, Datu Puti, saka kinain ko 'yung Magnolia Ice Cream. Sumakit lang ang tiyan ko. Gusto ko lang magpapansin. Hindi kasi ako kinukuha ng Diatabs!

Yon na lang ang hindi ko nae-endorse. Yong barko, kay Sharon (Cuneta) na lang.

(Depends on my mood. But its confusing. Once, I mistook Motolite for mineral water; San Miguel beer for shampoo, Datu Puti vinegar for lotion. Once I took Alaxan, Circulan, Motolite, San Miguel beer, Datu Puti and Magnolia Ice Cream. I had a stomach ache. I want to call the attention of Diatabs! But I have not endorsed a shipping line, that belongs to Sharon Cuneta)

Are you really Visayan?
Ay oo, Bisaya talaga ako. Ubyus ba? (Yes, isn't it obvious?)

Critics say that you are being used by politicians. Care to comment?
Ah... hindi naman. Hindi naman nila ko magamit. Pa'no nila ako magamit, hindi naman ako na-attract sa kanila. (I don't think so, I don't even find them attractive.)





Dear Kuya, dear Andrew

Dear Kuya - Sugarfree

Dear kuya, kumusta ka na dyan?
Anong balita, malamig ba dyan? Dito mainit
pero kung bumagyo, para bang lahat ng tubig sa mundo ay nandito

Matagal na rin, mula nang ika’y magpasyang subukan
ang swerte, at abutin ang yong mga pangarap
Sa ibang bansa kung saan ikaw ay laging mag-isa
Kami tuloy dito, nag-aalala

Nasan ka man ngayon, ano mang oras na
ika’y may kailangan, tawag ka lang sa amin
at parang nandito ka na rin

Oo nga pala, kung nasayo pa ang checkered na
polo ko, sa yo na yan.
Hanap ka na rin
ng maraming mapapaglibangan dahil balita ko
mahal daw ang sine dyan

Dambuhala daw mga pinapakain dyan
tataba ka malamang.
Miss mo bang magtagalog?
Kuya pag may kumausap sayo
galingan mong mag-ingles
galingan mo kuya

Dear kuya
hinahanap ka ni mama at daddy
sulat ka palagi.

Miss ka namin
pati nga kapitbahay nagtatanong
san ka raw nagpunta? san ka raw nagpunta?
Nasan ka na…
Kuyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

i was touched with this song.

i guess my brother has his soft spot, too, just as ebe did.

we're clashing egos right now. a six-year-generation gap? i don't think so, just he's so stubborn. i don't want him to follow the road that i went through.. being an underdog and all. he needs to get over his twisted priorities.





'Wasted' votes are better than blank ballots

Repost: you can visit Martin Bautista's Blog: mbautistamd.blogspot.com

Letter to the Editor (@ Philippine Daily Inquirer)

I HAVE talked to people who say they find it difficult to come up with the 12 names that they can vote for senator, so they will probably leave blank some slots in their ballots.

I strongly suggested to them that, instead of voting for an "incomplete slate," they write in the names of the Kapatiran Party senatorial candidates: Adrian Sison, Martin Bautista and Jess Paredes. They may not be household names--but if only because they are not "trapos"--and are in fact fully qualified in terms of education, experience and vision--they will make better senators than most of the known candidates.



It is often said that intelligent votes are useless because they are swamped over by the sheer number of "masa" votes. (Remember Mareng Solita Monsod's candidacy?)

Some will say that a vote for Kapatiran is a "wasted" vote because its candidates are "unwinnable." But a wasted vote is better than a "blank" ballot. And there's a chance for your voices to be heard. That's why this appeal to those who are inclined to leave some slots blank anyway.

For the record, I do not know any one of the Kapatiran candidates personally. They may have their own chinks in their armors. But since they are not the usual trapos, show-biz personalities and other unqualified celebrities who have the gall to run, they will definitely be an improvement.

--NOEL TRINIDAD, 33 Firefly St., Valle Verde 6, Pasig City





cash-strapped

im cash strapped these days: repair charges = 2500. Our big tube won't work. must be overheating? super summer bugs me all the way. yes, ICs worn out, need replacement.

cable subscription = 2800. everyone's looking for a racket. those effing cable agents, those hidden charges on wire!! damn it! my head's blowing!

i subscribed on a newsletter on movie schedules few years back, although useless during that time, when i still grimacing on the blurry reception/ Now, the boob tube addict is back, but not really, the frenzy is gone. All i want is to watch something interesting, sometimes educational, rather than counting worthless hours of nonsense on FreeTV.

for the aftermath, electric bills rising, and the monthly cable fees. whatdaf!





tech support call center bloopers

We are benefited by this BPO industry, especially call centers. But do you wonder why do Americans outsource their customer service needs? I found out that there are some boneheads, maybe MANY. They feel superior because they speak the language fluently. Check the site of Agent George .

Then, a dose American morons:

Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out.
Tech support: Have you tried pushing the button?
Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck.
Tech support: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note.
Customer: No .. wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still on my desk... sorry....

===============

Tech support: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?

===============

Tech support: Good day. How may I help you?
Male customer: Hello... I can't print.
Tech support: Would you click on "start" for me and...
Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill Gates ya know.

===============

Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try, it says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it...

===============

Customer: I have problems printing in red...
Tech support: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: Aaaah....................thank you.

===============

Tech support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11.

===============
Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Tech support: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?
Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.
Tech support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.

Customer: OK
Tech support: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes
Tech support: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work...

===============

Tech support: Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital letter V as in Victor, the number 7.
Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?

===============

Customer: I can't get on the Internet.
Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password?

Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.

===============

Tech support: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape.

Tech support: That's not an anti-virus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.

===============

Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.

===============
Tech support: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.

Tech support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the circle around it?

===============
A woman customer called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer.

Tech support: Are you running it under windows?
Customer: "No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine."
===============

Another customer called Compaq tech support to say her brand new
computer wouldn't work. She said she unpacked the unit, plugged it in and
sat there for 20 minutes waiting for something to happen.

When asked what happened when she pressed the power
switch, she asked,

"What power switch?"

===============
Another IBM customer had trouble installing software and rang for support....

"I put in the first disk, and that was OK. It said to put in the second disk, and had some problems with the disk. When it said to put in the third disk, I couldn't even fit it in."

The user hadn't realized that "Insert Disk 2" implied to remove Disk 1 first.

===============
TSR: now, I want you to press F2 as soon as you see the Dell logo.

cust: ok...
cust: nothing's happening..

TSR: tap on it a few times..
cust: nothing's happening..

TSR: make sure that's F2 you're pressing ok..
cust: yeah, I'm pressing the letter F and the number 2 at the same time..





Upside Down

by Two Minds Crack
(remake yata ng 6cyclemind)


I've been spending some time
Thinking of you and I
Don't know if I can really make it tonight

I lie awake in the dark
Calm down, and I'll start
Thinking about you
It's almost breaking my heart

I don't know where I went wrong
Or what's going on
Baby, I feel like a lover tonight
Should I stay, should I go
Well I really don't know
Lately I've been missing you so

Baby you don't understand
Our love lies lost but
You're still holding my hand
Oh, and then you walk away
Just as I, I wanted to say...

You're turning me on
You turn me around
You turn my whole world upside down
You're turning me on
You turn me around
You turn my whole world upside down

Everytime I hurt you, well it's hurting me too
Don't know if I could really stay here tonight
I'm tired of thinking of you, and everything that you do
Tell me, what am I supposed to do

Well I just wanted to say that I need you today
Tell me, it's all gonna work out all right
Don't know where I should start, but with all of my heart
Baby let me be your lover tonight





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